That stupid Coke (soda).
What was I thinking?! It looked so good, and my stomach felt queasy.
I am wide AWAKE.
Maybe I should take a Tylenol PM?
I will give myself fifteen more minutes...
Relax. Stop thinking. Focus on your breathing.
I can't believe there was a scorpion upstairs in the bedroom hallway.
A small, tan bark scorpion.
The dangerous kind.
There could be a scorpion in my bed.
There could be a scorpion in the boys' beds.
One of these days, one of us is going to step on one.
It is just a matter of time.
I wish I could call pest control, but it is 12:30...a.m.
Those people! The previous owners.
Telling us they never saw any scorpions in the house and
then we hear their dog died from a scorpion bite?!
I need to call pest control tomorrow.
I wonder if they are open on Presidents' Day?
Dang that Coke!! Should I take the Tylenol?
It is so quiet. I can hear my own breathing. And the dogs snoring.
I am alone here. Alone here in my thoughts, in the quiet. How rare is that?
Fifteen more minutes.
Relax. Close your eyes. Calm down.
He was shaking and I was in denial. I ignored it. I went to church and ignored it. Of all the days to spend the afternoon in a loud stadium watching a terrible football game... He could have died. I would have blamed myself for the rest of my life, because I saw him. Shaking. Just for a few seconds, but I should have done something. Right then. I didn't know it was that serious, but I should have checked.
Thank you God. If you had anything to do with saving Andrew's life. Thank you.
Maybe I could write something about how Aaron's arms have grown too long for his new shirts,
and how his ankles peek out beneath his new pants (that I bought a month ago).
How did my sweet baby get so long and lanky?
How did he get so sweet?
How did he get so seven?
His kind heart and compassion give me hope that I am doing okay at this parenting thing.
I wonder what Aaron's teacher wants to talk about in his conference?
Last time she said he was a very sweet kid...has something changed?
Maybe this stuff with Andrew is having an effect.
Maybe it's his math. Dang math. Just like me, not a math brain.
I need to get out the flashcards.
Tomorrow we will start with the flashcards.
Why did we even buy Coke for the party!?
Who needs Coke?
Sugar, fizz, calories.
Why does prayer feel like I'm banging my head against a wall?
Why the same prayers, year after year, after year?
Hearts are breaking
and nothing changes.
God. Please help.
I hope Andrew and John don't get that stomach bug.
I don't think I can handle any more vomit.
Time for the Tylenol.