In April, 2010, when Andrew was 2 1/2, a tumor was discovered behind his eye. The tumor was removed, but it was found to be an aggressive cancer. He endured seven months of chemo and six weeks radiation. In December of 2010, the day after his last treatment, he was rushed to the ER with an almost fatal bacterial infection. He survived.

He is now seven-years-old!! I don't visit here much, because during the ordeal, this is where I dumped everything--my rage, my fear, my sadness, my ugly, my hope, my everything. But I want all of you who supported and prayed for us to hear his updates. You helped me survive, and I am deeply thankful. Every once in awhile, I will check in to let you know how he's doing. Please continue to pray that cancer will never return to his body. Thank you.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Cereal, Chemo, and Conversations

I feel like I've been away forever!  It has only been a week.  

I've been busy.

I've been busy having conversations.

Conversations like this:

Me: "What do you want for breakfast?"

Andrew: "Cinnamon Toast Crunch"

Me: "We don't have any.  What else do you want?"

Andrew:  "Cinnamon Toast Crunch."

Me: "We are all out.  What else do you want?"

Andrew:  "Cinnamon Toast Crunch."

Me: "I wish I had some for you.  I will buy some today.  But WE ARE ALL OUT.  What else do you want?  We have Lucky Charms ( I know, I am trying to foist Lucky Charms on my child...what kind of mom does that?  A desperate one.).  How about Lucky Charms?"

Andrew:  "I want Cinnamon Toast Crunch!"

Me:  "How about Rice Chex.  With a little sugar?"

Andrew:   "NO. I want Cinnamon Toast Crunch!" (He breaks down in tears)

Me:  "How about Lucky Charms?"

Aaron:  "I want Rice Chex."

I get out the Rice Chex.   On top of the Rice Chex bag, I find an almost empty bag of CINNAMON TOAST CRUNCH! Enough for one bowl!!

Me: "Andrew! I found Cinnamon Toast Crunch! Hooray!"

I pour it into his GREEN bowl (there were previous tears about bowl colors).

Andrew:  "NO!!"  (more tears)

Me : "What. do. you. want. Andrew?"

Andrew:  "Lucky Charms."


Me:  "Does ANYONE want this Cinnamon Toast Crunch!?"

Sammy:  "I do."

I start to pour the CTC from Andrew's GREEN bowl to Sammy's RED bowl.

Andrew: "NO!"

Me:  "Andrew.  Do you want Cinnamon Toast Crunch or Lucky Charms?"

Andrew:  "Lucky Charms."

Me:  "Okay.  Then Sammy is going to have the Cinnamon Toast Crunch.  Okay?"

Andrew:  an almost imperceptible nod, tears still dripping

I pour the Cinnamon Toast Crunch into the RED bowl.  Lucky Charms into the GREEN bowl.  And Rice Chex into the ORANGE bowl. 

I breathe in. 

I breathe out.

I sit down with a brown bowl full of Wheat Chex (with a little sugar), bring the spoon up to my mouth, and...

All three boys:  "Can I have something to drink?"


Are you exausted? and tired of the words "Cinnamon Toast Crunch?"

Because I am!!  This was just one of many conversations. 

Many of them are very sweet.

But some of them are so emotional it is hard to know how to handle them.

And I this because of the chemo (he has been hooked up to tubes all week...)? or because he just turned three!?

Maybe a little of both.


When I wasn't having prolonged conversations about cereal,
there were other activities to attend to. 

Some fun, some not so fun.

Halloween: Fun.
i am supposed to be Lucy Ricardo...but I couldn't stand the wig.

A pumpkin patch:  Fun.

Hanging out at the beach (oncology clinic) every day:  Fun decorations.  But not so fun.

Making germs (first grade homework):  Kinda fun.

And trying to clean a disaster of a house:  Not so fun.

I feel like I keep cleaning up, but it just gets messier and messier.  I put one dish away and two more are used.

(No pictures of THAT).

In fact, I really need to be cleaning my house instead of sitting here.

But here I sit.  Relaxing.  Because wow!  It has been a week!!

How have you been?  I wouldn't know because I haven't had time to check in!!

I will soon.  :)


  1. Oh Julie ... that SO sounds like our breakfast time, esp the drink bit {you would think we would have figured out "pour the drinks first"}. AND ... three boys = mess, I say relax when you can, the mess will wait {It does at my place!}

  2. That pretty much sums up my life...especially next week when we have to make another trip to the dreaded oncologist. *SIGH*

  3. My house is comparable to yours in terms of messiness I'm sure. Caregivers should be given maids.

    I know what you mean about just barely sitting down and instantly someone wants something else... but, at our house it's the purple bowl that's the prized one.

    Those germs are so cool!

  4. Sounds like a tired three year old to me. :)

    Love the germs... very cool!

  5. Oh yes, that sounds like a very familiar mealtime routine at our house. I always marvel at kids who just seem to eat what they're served. Where can I get one of those? :)

  6. there are nuances of that conversation in our house and I only have 1 child!!! have a great weekend, Julie!

  7. Those germs are awesome.
    And for what it is worth, I also have a 3 year old (who hasn't been hooked up to tubes and crap all week) and most mornings sound a bit like yours (except she insists on a blue or Winnie The Pooh bowl).

  8. OMG. where do I start?!

    Breakfast conversations... yes.
    Three-year-olds are just plain emotional, you know that. They say "terrible twos", but threes are much much worse.

    But the kicker.... germs as first grade homework? Seriously???!! I don't think I covered that in high school! (Maybe because it's on elementary curriculum and I can't remember that far back?) Wow. I can't wait to learn what Evan is going to learn in school! ;)

  9. Yep, been there, done that. It seems like I think I get them settled into their food, I make myself something and I'm starving. I sit down for the first wonderful bite and before I get it in my face...."MOM! I need a !".

    Your germ art is awesome!!! Braden was a Storm Trooper this year too.


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